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Anti.'s avatar

While i love Dean Spade's writing in general, i deeply distrust the approach he promotes in his books when it comes to conflict, in my opinion a central question. I agree with you on the crucial role that relationships play in our political praxis, and also with the point you make that they are sometimes messy, raw. The conflict averse and individualizing approach Spade promotes does not sound like a valid solution that works for everyone. I think Starhawk has done much better work on this topic. Her approach invites conflict, as a given, bound to happen, and instead offers tools for how to deal with them in constructive ways when they do occur (impact vs. intention, mediation, rage circles etc). Whereas Spade by and large seems to suggest to always find fault within oneself. Of course, critical self-reflection is always central, but if we sanitize our conflicts too much, we also miss out on a chance to go much deeper in our relationships. The risk and conflict adverse attitude that often reigns in our circles is a huge problem.

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Paul Malm's avatar

Heaps of gratitude for your words, analysis, keeping it real, and being courageous + resilient amidst it all. Big love.

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